It's not that Jennifer Aniston has never participated in anything good, or that she is wholly untalented. Quite the contrary -- Friends had its moments, Office Space is the best, and The Good Girl was as close to a movie for grown-ups with moderately developed brains as she's apparently capable of accepting. She just tends to choose projects based on what will keep her famous, as opposed to ones that will keep us from rolling our eyes, and with the stupidly cloying Love Happens coming out soon, I thought I'd review some of her worst (and some okay) cinematic offenses so far. And there are many, but in an effort to be fair to the girl, I'm only counting things she did after Friends, when she actually had some control over her career, which means no Leprechaun jokes. Sorry, we all do things we're not proud of when we're broke, so she gets a free pass on that one. But everything else? Fair game.
The Bad
Marley and Me
It's a movie that presented itself as a feel-good family comedy but actually wanted to make you cry at Christmas so badly it killed a dog. In case you hadn't figured this out yourself, Marley & Me is happy to point out to you that life is a series of progressive disappointments, and then you have to do schmaltzy holiday films when you used to be Owen Wilson, guy who actually made movies people liked and respected, and then your dog dies. Happy holidays!
Along Came Polly
Diarrhea is bad for dates! Ferrets are bad for dates! Ben Stiller is NOT funny. This movie sucked.
Picture Perfect
The first of many "I'm a very desperate woman!" movies for Aniston, Picture Perfect is about a -- gasp! -- unmarried woman who is so hopeless in attracting Kevin Bacon that she hires a guy to pretend to love her in an attempt to make him so jealous that he marries her, despite being beautiful, successful and likely capable of attracting him on merit if she weren't so damn pathetic. And that brilliant plan? It doesn't even work.
Derailed
If you're fresh off the end of your immensely popular sitcom and trying to break out of the character America will irreversibly always see you as with a thriller, try not to pick the absolute worst screenplay in town. Even if it does have Clive Owen attached to it, it will still be terrible, and you will still be miscast.
Rumor Has It
You know how The Graduate was really good? This is like that, only terrible, and with Kevin Costner.
Rock Star
Weren't the '80s hilarious? Everyone had such ridiculous hair! So much so that there was an entire musical fad in which bands called "hair bands" had ridiculous hair whilst singing fairly loud songs! Think of that, and then add in every single pitfall of fame and small town loser dreams big cliché you can think of, and you've got the entire movie without even seeing it.
The Good
He's Just Not That Into You
Overall a good movie. But of course Jennifer Aniston plays very desperate woman who practically begs her boyfriend to marry her.
The Break-Up
Men and women are so different, it's hysterical. Men like baseball and video games, and women like to do dishes and have unreasonable expectations. Often times that causes them to argue and stop dating each other, which can become even more complicated when there is real estate involved! At time just trite and childish, this movie is probably Jennifer Aniston's best.
The Object of My Affection
A pregnant New York social worker falls in love with her gay best friend, and decides she'd rather raise her child with him, than her own boyfriend. This is actually a pretty smart romantic comedy with a little twist.
Friends With Money
After she quits her lucrative job, Olivia finds herself unsure about her future and her relationships with her successful and wealthy friends. Boring at times, but a solid cast and solid writing make this one of Aniston's most ambitious films.
The Good Girl
Aniston plays a discount girl who strikes up an affair with a stock boy. Probably Aniston's best work of acting ever. If she did more roles and films like this, she would have been taken seriously as an actress.
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